All parents in the world want their children to be happy, but it is a problem to want to avoid all the frustrations because children will grow up thinking that life is all a bed of roses. And that is not the reality. A child who grows up without frustrations of any kind will not reach happiness, if not all those frustrations avoided by parents, will become much bigger and stronger as children grow.
The world is full of frustrations and it is necessary to teach children the necessary strategies to overcome them than to teach them an unreal world just because they are (sometimes unintentionally) overprotective parents. It is important to teach children to love life, to know that happiness is a path and in no case, a goal.
If you want a happy child: open your eyes
Beware of the short path to happiness. Be careful with the magical instructions so that your child is the happiest. Your child can be happy, of course. But you must also learn to be sad, to handle anger, to know that frustrations are real … And that in order to be yourself, you should not be the slave of others. You must learn to say NO when you do not want something and you must learn to receive NO in life, because life is full of negatives.
Open your eyes. Look the life. You know that it is not easy, you know that there is stress, that bills must be paid, that there are potholes that must be jumped. Life is full of questions and sometimes terrible feelings that are difficult to handle, but they exist. And children must learn to understand these feelings, to be able to name them, so that later, they will be able to understand what is happening to them and have the necessary strategies to seek solutions and get up when they fall. But you must first, open your eyes. Allow your children to make mistakes, under your guidance to make mistakes, to understand that they are the best allies to learn and be a better version of yourself.
Do not hide reality from your children
Although you must take into account the evolutionary age of your children to be able to explain things to them in one way or another, it is important that you do not hide reality from them. DO NOT paint reality in an unreal way, do not want them to believe that life is all rosy, because life is full of nuances. Teach your children to be brave, to have courage in life, to be perseverant, to understand that responsibility and perseverance is the secret of almost anything … That the effort belongs to each one and that in life, it given away loses real value.
Avoid making your child a slave to society. Avoid believing that frustrations are the fault of others, avoid falling into the law of minimum effort that will lead to a consumer life and meaningless. You have to love life even though it is unfair, despite the fact that life hurts sometimes. Happiness will be valued much more when the positive side of suffering and the courage of wanting to move forward is understood.
Children have the right to have calm parents
Forget the alternative, traditional and any other pedagogies to educate your children. Forget them because what matters is that the children have calm parents, with emotional intelligence and who know how to respect the little ones in the house. Children have the right to enjoy their parents without worries, without measuring their words at every moment, but they also have the right that their parents are not perfect, because we are human beings. Parents also make mistakes, yell and get nervous.
But the secret is in handling these situations, in taking a deep breath and apologizing to the children so that they can see that adults respect them and take responsibility for our actions. Happiness is not having a life free of problems, it is understanding them wisely and looking for solutions that make us feel good.